Hang on, an introverted extrovert? Surely that’s an oxymoron, a mistake, a contradiction in terms. Barking mad…?
This is a confusing statement not least because most traditional ‘personality type’ tests would plant us firmly either in one camp, or the other. That’s the easy part. But both at the same time? How is this even possible? And more importantly, don’t we have enough to be confused about in life without adding another personality type to the mix. Surely life was more simple when we were either one or the other. A neat little package.
If you identify with the gist of the title, you’ll definitely recognise a number of the following ‘key markers’ for the Intro-Extro type, so read on and prepare to be enlightened:
- We need alone time BEFORE and AFTER any social occasion:
Because we’re like little pocket rockets when we’re out in company, a full on force-field of conversation, happiness and joy, we find the whole thing frankly exhausting and will need to retreat to our caves once the whole experience is over with.
2. We are very selective with our social calendar:
Believe it or not, we could happily take or leave the whole socialising thing. Don’t get us wrong, we love to be invited to everything, and will be offended easily if we’re not readily included in your circle, just don’t expect us to accept every invitation, and especially don’t expect us to turn up to everything either.
3. We make new friends very quickly, but have a hard time keeping it up:
We love to meet new people, and get to know them, but we find it hard to maintain our energy between many people in our lives, so if you’re in our long-term social circle then consider yourself very special to us indeed.
4. Small talk bores the hell out of us:
We’re really not that bothered about what you ate for dinner, or how long it took you to navigate the M25. BUT we do want to get to know you truly, deeply and fully. We will be your friend for life if you want us to, just don’t expect any small talk over the canapés.
5. We can be REALLY quiet in a crowd:
Ok so this is an odd one. We love people, and one of our favourite places to be is in a cafe full of strangers where we can really feel part of the world and its hubbub. It’s just that we prefer the one-on-one company of a deep friendship where we can really shine and show our great listening skills. We want to get to know YOU, not ALL of the crowd. We find other people intimidating at times and a large group of friends on a night out is just not our thing. Sorry.
6. We always have a social escape plan:
Due to the extreme likelihood of exhausting ourselves from being the life and soul of a party, we know it won’t be long before we burn out, so it’s likely we will have a good excuse up our sleeve to free us from the terror of being held hostage until, god forbid, last orders or kicking out time.
7. We’re often quiet;
Being known as an extrovert means people can expect you to be ‘on’ all the time. Sometimes we’re just not that inclined to speak. We are great thinkers and like to spend a lot of time inside our heads, so if we’re quieter than usual it’s just us recharging our batteries. Don’t be offended.
8. A natural people person, but we don’t like to talk all the time:
Don’t get me wrong, we can talk the hind legs off a donkey, and often do when the time is right. As per point 7, we just run out of steam sometimes and prefer to save our talking for when it’s really needed. Often the key to being a good people person and gaining the trust of another is knowing when to shut the £$%* up!
9. We need MASSES of notice for a social occasion:
We’re not very good at ‘on the hoof’ arrangements. We don’t like surprises. We like time to prepare ourselves mentally and physically for a social outing (by hibernating for at least a month prior to and after the date). So if you spring something on us, don’t be offended if we seem a little taken aback. We just need at LEAST a whole YEAR, preferably two in advance notice!
10. We’re hard to drag out to party, but we’ll be the life and soul when we are there:
…..and then, approximately an hour in to proceedings, we’ll crash and burn and run home to recharge our batteries, in solitude.
Let me know if you identify, I’d be really pleased to hear from fellow introverted extroverts!
Originally posted 2017-05-15 18:45:36.